Deleted Member: A word of advice at Meet Afghan Singles
A word of advice
11 Dec 2011 at 00:38
If you're going to initiate a conversation, be prepared to be engaging and inquisitive. There's nothing worse than the example below which I've experienced several times.
Her: Hi, how are you?
Me: Good thanks. How about you?
Her: Fine
End of conversation. I refuse to entertain such conversations. If you've initiated it, you've expressed your intent to get to know me. Consequently, the onus is on you to open avenues of conversation. In the above example, merely saying "fine" has led me to believe that:
a) You just needed someone to ask you how you were doing, and after having been posed that question, you are content with ending the conversation.
b) You expect me to entertain you with questions so that you can sit back and pretend like you've contributed, but you're unaware that your single word response is a conversation killer.
c) You have exhausted the extent of your English and are unable to proceed in which case you need to switch to Farsi.
d) You lack conversation skills and need to brush up on said skills.
A simple solution to the above example could be saying, "Fine. I'm Jane by the way." This allows the conversation to continue developing and opens up a window of opportunity not only for me to introduce myself, but to take on the role of the inquirer.
Her: Hi, how are you?
Me: Good thanks. How about you?
Her: Fine
End of conversation. I refuse to entertain such conversations. If you've initiated it, you've expressed your intent to get to know me. Consequently, the onus is on you to open avenues of conversation. In the above example, merely saying "fine" has led me to believe that:
a) You just needed someone to ask you how you were doing, and after having been posed that question, you are content with ending the conversation.
b) You expect me to entertain you with questions so that you can sit back and pretend like you've contributed, but you're unaware that your single word response is a conversation killer.
c) You have exhausted the extent of your English and are unable to proceed in which case you need to switch to Farsi.
d) You lack conversation skills and need to brush up on said skills.
A simple solution to the above example could be saying, "Fine. I'm Jane by the way." This allows the conversation to continue developing and opens up a window of opportunity not only for me to introduce myself, but to take on the role of the inquirer.
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